Monday, May 2, 2016

Why I am Ok With Getting Married and Having Children Late

I got married at the ripe old age of 29. Two and a half months away from 30th birthday. Sometimes I think, 'man I'd wish we found each other earlier!' Then I really think about it and say timing was right.

I've matured:
I am half way through my first year of marriage.  I look back on things and think, I'm definitely not the same Mexi at 30 that I was at 22 or even at 26 years old when I met my husband. I don't believe I was as ready for marriage then as compared to now. I've grown and matured so much. Certain situations that arise now, I would not have made the best decision on how to handle when I was younger. I'm impatient, stubborn, emotional, and quick tempered ( I know. I know. The Lord still working on me ). I'd be quick to walk away from people and situations. That's not what you do in marriage. Being with my husband has taught me patience, being better about picking my battles, and knowing what to say and when to just hold my tongue. I've learned a lot through my dealings with him and through his guidance while dealing with others. My immaturity could have ruined our marriage or made it a very rough and rocky start. Worrying about being married by a certain age could've had me rush and marry the wrong person or marry when I was not emotionally ready..

I've enjoyed childless traveling. 
While a lot of people have been raisingawesome kids and growing beautiful families, I have been seeing the world.  There was no need for me to sit at home and wait around for Mr. Right.  Why not enjoy the beautiful life God has given me? From the Eiffel Tower in Paris to the amazing islands of Japan. I've seen things on 5 of the continents thus far and it won't stop once I have kids, but I know my pace will change when they are in the picture.  Now when they come I won't feel bad about my travel plans changing.

I'm good on my career:
I have taken the time do accomplish certain goals in my life that I wanted to achieve before starting a family. In no way shape or form am I saying it cannot be done with a family already in place. For me, it's easier to work things out this way. I want to be stable and not be worried so much about my education and my career and focus more on my babies. I do plan to go back to school and it will happen when there are little ones running around, but I have my base established. I know everything in life is a balancing act.

I'm content with me personally and It's no one else's business what I decide:
I know people mean well when they ask people about marriage and babies and give advice on what and how we women should do things since it hasn't happened yet, but it really isn't any of their business. If you are close enough with people and ask them if they plan to marry or have kids then cool, leave it at that. Telling them when they should start, or what sex of the baby you want them to have could be uncomfortable. You really don't know what has happened in that person's life for them not to be married or with child. Asking them why they are married or have children yet can come off as if something is wrong. You may not have meant for it to come off that way, but that's how it could be perceived. Being single for the rest of your life and not having kids is perfectly fine too. It is your life.  I am now married and I am enjoying the time I have with my hubby.  Whatever our future holds, we will take it on together day by day.  Looking back from where I started to now. I am thankful to be here.  Everything happens when it's supposed to happen. It is all according to God's plan.

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