Thursday, May 26, 2016

Where's Your Boaz? Show Yourself Worthy

You complain about that job you hate. How do your bosses see you? Are you putting forth your best effort?

You complain about being single. Have you taken the time to truly prepare yourself for a meaningful relationship that God has for you?  Have you taken the time to be alone and enjoy your own company? Are you out being active and serving God?

I ask these questions because we always look to God to supply our needs and take care of us. Sometimes we thank him and many times we don't because we really don't realize how much God does for us even when we don't deserve it.  We are spoiled and we get in our own way at times. You expect the best, but did you take a moment to see what you have done to deserve the best?  

One of my favorite  scriptures is faith without works is dead.  I believe God has everything you will need but he will not just hand it over to you without you doing your part.  Sometimes you have to show God you know how to handle what you have before he can bless you with more. No matter how small or less than you may think it is.  Do you really think you deserve a new job or raise when you show up to work late, have a bad attitude or not produce quality work because you feel it's beneath you?  Having a good attitude and outlook and performing your work now for the job you want later is the attitude you must have.

We women love to talk about the story of Ruth and Boaz in the bible.  We all talk about we want our Boaz.  If you read the full story, Ruth went through some hard times.  She lost her husband and decided to stick by her mother-in-law when it was not required.  Ruth went and worked diligently in the fields. She was noticed by Boaz because of her work, her devotion, and her attitude.

If you are single, you maybe praying to God to send your king or queen.  Are your preparing yourself? Are you working hard and busy about the work of God? The right person will take notice of the person you are and who trying to become.

Don't rush a blessing you may not be ready for. Put in the work to be ready.  One of the worst things to do is to force something you weren't ready to have. Another is to hold on to something you were meant to let go.  As we live daily in this world, we are representatives of God.  Our thoughts, actions toward others, and just the general way we carry ourselves should be a reflection of him. We will at times fall short but as long as we are consistently reflecting the good works of God, then we leave the door open for the opportunity for our blessings to come through. 

Monday, May 16, 2016

I Know Who I Am

After a situation occurred someone told me they didn't think I was really a bad person in spite of it all. I laughed to myself later thinking I know the kind of person I am. What you decide after not really knowing more about me is your choice.

We often get judged off of one situation or circumstance in our life and that leaves a lasting impression on another individual. There isn't much you can do about it and there is no need to dwell on it. The one thing you can do is keep living. When you do your best to live a life according to the word of God, let that be your entire truth.

Do not focus on one point in your life. Focusing on that one point in our lives is how many of us get tripped up. We end up becoming that moment. You get hung up on that moment that turns into an entire season of your life when that wasn't it's original intention. Move forward and learn from your situation and don't let it define you.

God knows who you are and who you were created to be. Embrace your truth from him and not a label that someone else gives you. When you focus on the right things in your life, beautiful things happen. You realize what's important and you're able to live a fulfilled life.

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Do We Raise Daughters to Become Mothers?

Do We Raise Daughters to become mothers? 

This was a question one of my Facebook friends posed to all of us and it got me to thinking about how I was raised.

I believe was raised to be a good person. My mom didn't raise me to be a mother, but I had her to be an excellent example of what mother can be. I'll never forget when I was a 20 yrs old visiting during my college spring break. I had my boyfriend of 3 years with me. People who knew me and saw me in this long term relationship stated to me it's serious and hinted at marriage in my future. I asked my mom should I be thinking about marriage? The idea actually frightened me because I felt far too young to be thinking about marriage.  She told me when it's that time, I would know. She said not to worry about what other people say about what I should do and when I should be doing it. She never pushed me in one direction or another, she allowed me to develop on my own.

Though I am not a mother to a girl, I believe that we should raise our girls with good moral
character.  If I am blessed with a daughter, I will raise my little girl to know that she can be whatever she wants to be, do whatever she wants to do and be a good mother to her children.  I will not raise her to believe that the end all goal is to be a wife and mother. I will raise her to find out what satisfies her in life and if that is being a wife and/or a mother, then I am satisfied.

By nature I believe women to be emotional creatures and nurturers. Not everyone is built that way and may require time to develop certain traits or characteristics and that is perfectly fine. I think as mothers, we sometimes unknowingly raise our children through our actions as well. My mom did not out right say to me everything I needed to know about being a woman. I saw in her everyday interactions with people and my Dad.  I saw her get home from work and prepare dinner for us and she got up in the morning and did the same for breakfast.  I saw how she put my Dad and his needs first, but we were still loved and cared for.  I saw how they worked together as a team.  I saw that they spent most of their time with each other instead of with other people.

I do think times have changed and there are more single parent homes so the two parent dynamic is something that can not be seen in every home.  I believe women who understand the two parent family dynamic should be be willing to take an active role in a young lady's life and be another positive role model.  You should not try to replace a girl's mother, but be a sister and help her.  We live in a society now where I feel we as women do not fully support each other and we do not fully carry ourselves with the pride and respect we deserve.  We need to be better example of women to our daughters and to other women who are trying to find their way.  We are the backbone of our society and we have forgotten how powerful we are.  We need to raise our daughters to know their worth.  A strong foundation of values and principles is where we need to start and build.

Monday, May 2, 2016

Why I am Ok With Getting Married and Having Children Late

I got married at the ripe old age of 29. Two and a half months away from 30th birthday. Sometimes I think, 'man I'd wish we found each other earlier!' Then I really think about it and say timing was right.

I've matured:
I am half way through my first year of marriage.  I look back on things and think, I'm definitely not the same Mexi at 30 that I was at 22 or even at 26 years old when I met my husband. I don't believe I was as ready for marriage then as compared to now. I've grown and matured so much. Certain situations that arise now, I would not have made the best decision on how to handle when I was younger. I'm impatient, stubborn, emotional, and quick tempered ( I know. I know. The Lord still working on me ). I'd be quick to walk away from people and situations. That's not what you do in marriage. Being with my husband has taught me patience, being better about picking my battles, and knowing what to say and when to just hold my tongue. I've learned a lot through my dealings with him and through his guidance while dealing with others. My immaturity could have ruined our marriage or made it a very rough and rocky start. Worrying about being married by a certain age could've had me rush and marry the wrong person or marry when I was not emotionally ready..

I've enjoyed childless traveling. 
While a lot of people have been raisingawesome kids and growing beautiful families, I have been seeing the world.  There was no need for me to sit at home and wait around for Mr. Right.  Why not enjoy the beautiful life God has given me? From the Eiffel Tower in Paris to the amazing islands of Japan. I've seen things on 5 of the continents thus far and it won't stop once I have kids, but I know my pace will change when they are in the picture.  Now when they come I won't feel bad about my travel plans changing.

I'm good on my career:
I have taken the time do accomplish certain goals in my life that I wanted to achieve before starting a family. In no way shape or form am I saying it cannot be done with a family already in place. For me, it's easier to work things out this way. I want to be stable and not be worried so much about my education and my career and focus more on my babies. I do plan to go back to school and it will happen when there are little ones running around, but I have my base established. I know everything in life is a balancing act.

I'm content with me personally and It's no one else's business what I decide:
I know people mean well when they ask people about marriage and babies and give advice on what and how we women should do things since it hasn't happened yet, but it really isn't any of their business. If you are close enough with people and ask them if they plan to marry or have kids then cool, leave it at that. Telling them when they should start, or what sex of the baby you want them to have could be uncomfortable. You really don't know what has happened in that person's life for them not to be married or with child. Asking them why they are married or have children yet can come off as if something is wrong. You may not have meant for it to come off that way, but that's how it could be perceived. Being single for the rest of your life and not having kids is perfectly fine too. It is your life.  I am now married and I am enjoying the time I have with my hubby.  Whatever our future holds, we will take it on together day by day.  Looking back from where I started to now. I am thankful to be here.  Everything happens when it's supposed to happen. It is all according to God's plan.